Hooking Up

Where was this show when I was single? Not that I have gone out on so many bad dates - I'm the type who knows how to enjoy myself no matter how bad the guy is. No, really! Still, American men are SO easy to perceive once you know the basis of how they all think hahaha! Especially the not-so-brilliant-ones. I've watched all episodes of ABC's new reality tv show 'Hooking Up' and I must say, "I love it!". Every single woman (and man) out there NEEDS to watch this. It's educational! :) It also explains why a lot of them are single... and might actually give some of you an idea why you might be. 'Picky' is just an excuse other people tell you why you're single. Trust me!

A few of them have actually found love on the internet which is awesome. The rest... they are looking way too hard I think. My gawd, some don't even go on second dates. Granted, some are just no-way-situations. But some of these people don't even give the other party a second chance!! I think it's sad. No wonder so many marriages end up in divorces. To base a person by one phone call and one drink, one mistake. It's just plain unfair. I always give the other party one more chance - especially if they think I'm attractive LOL. Hey, if they do, they must have VERY good taste and at least half a brain hahahaha!

People are just out to meet 'the one'. Not knowing how to have a good time en route to meeting that person. They are so blinded by having to fall head over heels in love with the person the first time they lay eyes on them that they miss what's great about the 'wrong' person. The big thing on the show is the word 'chemistry'.... the lack of it mostly. Ok, there were a couple of liars out there who turned out to be a big laugh (and I wouldn't be happy either if it happened to me). It's like having me and Willie Nelson meeting up trying to have a conversation about gardening. (even if that happened I'd have fun lol) But generally, most of the single people on the show are plain narrow-minded and non risk-takers. What happens? You end up being nicely dressed, looking forward to a good time and then experiancing yet another disappointment. Have fun for crying out loud!!! Talk! Have a nice conversation! You're there already, you might as well enjoy yourself!

I may be no beauty queen nor a Harvard grad but I am very happily married to a great guy while they're still out there on the dating scene and not having a good time while doing so. To the hot, tall, skinny 30-something year old women out there: in the words of Nelson from the Simpsons "ha ha!".

Gawd, I'm SO going to hell!!! (see previous post "I'm SO Going To Hell!")

Dukes of Hazzard

My friends and I just got back from the movies. There really wasn't anything else to see (it was either see sorry ass Tom Cruise in War of the World , Sky High or worst of all, Bad News Bears. So it was really a desperate move to go watch 'Dukes'.

Keep in mind that I'm usually very easily entertained at movies. I like pretty much everything as long as it's funny (if it's supposed to be funny) and chick flicks are always good too. So I can't say I can agree with the horrible reviews for 'Dukes'... I mean, yes, Jessica Simpson is pretty embarassingly bad an actress; but she's got a hot bod! Other than that, it was funny. If you like brainless funny movies (not as vulgar as the American Pie series), then you'd enjoy it. The four teenage boys sitting in front of us three women (ages 21, 35 and 49) were silent compared to our roaring laughters. Embarassing! :) All they laughed at were times when they said 'shit'. Sorry ass boys!!!

Naomi, Julie and I were all pleasantly surprised and enjoyed the movie. I give it 3 stars out of 5! :)

(Bruce called me a hill billy for liking the movie... ok this is the second time I've been called a hill billy by my husband)

I'm SO Going To Hell!!!

I was chatting online earlier this morning with my old friend Takae. She's Japanese and we met at the University of Arizona through a mutual (ex)friend Vanessa. Let's see. I think the very first time I met Takae was at Sinbad's for Arabic food. Almost instantly, we took a liking to each other. Well, I did her at least lol. Takae is an outspoken Asian woman who loves to drink and eat. Now how can you not find women like her (and I) to be appealing lol. Richard and Bruce certainly have great taste in women!!! ...so naturally, we got along very well during our school days and continue our friendship via the internet these days since we've both followed our husbands' and moved to Texas and Tennessee.

It's always fun chatting with old friends. Of course, we talked about our husbands blah blah blah... and about the time she helped trim and shape my eyebrows (and what a good job she did 'coz my cousins back home all commented on it)... and of course, about all the guys who came in and out of my life back then as a single girl.

So why am I going to hell!? Well, the chat lead us to talk about Mo and how I made him eat pork when I served him pork fried rice knowing full and well he's Muslim (hey, he didn't reject it when I put the bowl in front of him and said 'there is pork') lol... I also pretty much made full use of him 'coz I needed some furniture put together and lead him to believe the many prospects for more lol... I also remember making my vegetarian friend eat frog legs LOL. There's been no turning back since then. She's a now a carnivore. Then there was Mark... Mark... generally a nice guy but basically an idiot. Let's just say he wasn't the most considerate guy - I know Takae is laughing as she reads this blog. He used to call and tell me he was on his way to pick me up without telling me where we were going 'coz it was a surprise. Without fail, the damn surprise would be to take me to eat freakin' Mexican food. Hooray... NOT! I went out with another guy at the same time I was dating Mark (hey, there was no ring on my ringer!!) and was caught red handed by Mark... still, he wanted me in his life. I DID say he's an idiot, right? Oh well... I'm SO glad those days, albeit, fun, are over and done with. I'm older and the last thing I need is to have idiots surround me thinking they can get into my panties... yikes, and I just remembered that IBM guy who was SO ugly (but rich LOL) I couldn't even let him kiss me (on the cheek) good night after a date LOL. ....and this is only a fraction of all the evil things I've said and done.

Like I said, I'm SO going to hell...

Think Before You Open Your Damn Mouth IDIOT!

Last night, we attended our neighbor's 50th party. It was a nice enough party considering it was raining and the outdoor party had to be brought indoors and I met a flip whom I dislike from first sight (but that's another story) and then there was this other neighbor... well not exactly our neighbor; she doesn't live in our cove and I've never seen her nor her husband before... but she seemed VERY excited to meet me and Bruce when I told her I lived across the street from Bill and Karen. She started asking me if I knew the people who lived in the house before us were also Asian. DUH I bought the phucking house from them for crying out loud!! Dumbass. She says 'yeah I knew you weren't here 'coz she's A LOT SMALLER'. Oooo-KAY... so she's a petite little skinny Japanese woman and I'm not skinny. I'm also not phucking 60 years old!!! What was the idea of pointing this fact out to me?!?! I lost all patience with her and slowly pulled myself away from the conversation.

My buddy Genevieve had a similar incident happen to her last week in NYC. Some guy had mistaken her for some girl who works at a take-out place and then only to say 'yeah I knew you weren't her but maybe a sister or something since she's smaller'.

Hello(?!), what is wrong with these people?! If you haven't got anything nice to say at all, keep your phucking mouth SHUT! ...and if you want to call me fat, you can do so all you want behind my back. I don't need phucking reminders, thank you very much!

Words Get In The Way...

I don't know why I was nervous... but everytime I thought of calling my cousins back home to convey my condolences, I had butterflies in my stomach. Nerves... made me sick to my stomach. I guess I just didn't know what to say. It's so much easier to say "I'm sorry to hear about your mother" in English... but in Mandarin, as much as I'm fluent, I'm at a lost for words. When you say 'I'm sorry' in Mandarin, it's just a plain apology for something you've done wrong. Not the different kinds of apology you can have in English. Do I say 'hi hao ma?' 'coz that means 'you-are-good?' directly translated and that's a stupid question to ask 'coz I know she's obviously not good for crying out loud! More than that, I was afraid of how I would react... worst, how they would react... if I'm still in an emotional state, I'm sure they are too. I mean, obviously everyone is still grieving. It's ther mom! But my mom's told me how the monk who's been doing the prayers have assured everyone that dua-yi is an angel now and no more tears should be shed... I don't know why the word angel sounds so... commercial(?) in English. 'Angel' just doesn't sound very godly I guess. While in Mandarin, it almost has a superpower connotation. Maybe 'shen(2)' means... more like... 'god'?... but in English that'll be too strong a word. I can't win.

Either way, I called last night at 10pm our time, 11am Singapore time. Very quickly, my cousin Winnie and I started to have a cheerful conversation. I guess everyone at home is relieved that their mom is no more in pain nor suffering. She died still beautiful... and more then once, I've heard 'she just looks like she's sleeping'. I spent a good hour on the phone with my er-jie (second sister, Winnie) and my san-jie (third sister, Kim). Er-jie told me the two people grieving most are my mom and my mom's 4th sister. I know how my mom is... I can just imagine.

The funeral is tomorrow where they'd see the whole cremation process. I think this is going to be the most painful sight no matter how detached you are by day five of the death. I should be there with mom... I know she's still in a lot of pain. Maybe with it, her sister's death brings some fear as well. So she's 20 years younger. Doesn't make a difference. I guess one just don't expect people you love to just disappear and never be seen again. Ever.

Food TV Makes Me Crave FOOD!

My craving yesterday was funnel cake. Mmmm, funnel cake! So my beloved Bruce took me down to Autozone Park and of course, got me a funnel cake... yum(!!!). I enjoyed it under the intense Memphis July heat while my sweetie enjoyed his bbq nachos. We enjoyed three full innings of the game between the not-so-good Redbirds and the not-so-good, but better-then-the-Redbirds, Fresno Grizzlies, then left hahaha. It was not that an exciting game anyway... Bruce told me later that we lost... 6-2 DUH!

Anywayz, I got my funnel cake and I was happy! After an hour under the sun, we both came home to a long deep nap lol.

She's Passed Away

I called home earlier and was told that my aunt has passed away. As much as we'd all expected this day would come sooner then later, it still hit me like a rock. I am sad... very sad. I knew I'd be down but I didn't expect the pain... so different from the time when my brother told me nonchanlantly that my grandfather has passed on.

My conversation with mom this evening was cut short 'coz I didn't want to cry on the phone. She's upset enough. Thank goodness my adorable little 4 month old neice is there to cheer her up. I can just imagine what she's going through...

It's times like that that I feel the distance between my family and I. I haven't felt it too often but these are moments when I wished I was home with everyone else. Yes, grieving; but nonetheless together.

My Dua-Yi Is Dying...

My dua-yi is my oldest aunt. My mom's oldest sister of 10 kids...

It's hard... I get my updates from my brother, my mom and lately, from Jaime (my dua-yi is her grandmother)... it's hard to fathom how a woman who just celebrated her 80th birthtday this past May was just fine, has deteriorated into a state of unconscious pain. Morphine. Lots of it. It's cancer... all over. Her internal organs are no more in working order. Hands, swollen... The doctor's said she hasn't got a week. It's painful to think, it's even more painful to write. YK (her grandson) just graduated from the local polytechnic. The first graduate in her family. A huge accomplishment! He brought his first girlfriend to his grandmother's bedside last week... she didn't get to see them. She hasn't been up in the last few days.

But this is to you dua-yi! For all the overnight stays at your house while mom and dad went out partying. For all the great weekends I spent at your house while everyone else hung out at your tiny little two bedroom flat playing mahjong. For all the times I slept on your old narrow couch with people dropping in and out of the flat for a meal; gossip... For all the awesome awesome food you cook! For that damned big black eye I got from running around at your house in my socks singing the Bonanza theme and knocking right into the corner of your coffee table. For all the times you took me to the wet market. For all the times I washed and dried dishes at your house. For all the precious moments just watching you grow old with grace. For making me watch your grandchildren while you played mahjong with mom. For all the laughs we had. For the trip to Taiwan, HK and the Phillipines we all took together.

It's been five years since I last saw you. Forever, my momeries of you being the matriarch of the Teo-family (and obviously, your Chua-family), the tough, loud, funny, fierce but gentle aunt will remain. You will not be forgotten.

Mediacorp.com.sg site SUXXXX!

Their English site and all their links to the radio and tv stations in particular. ARRGH! So frustrating! My gawd, it takes nine years to see if the link works and the pages don't even open right. If they do, tons of graphics are missing. It can't be just my computer (even tho' we're downloading stuff and listening to the radio online) 'coz every other site while slower, works fine! Fine I'm impatient. Okay, no wonder... the sun is screaming out there. ARRGH!

Rain and Cloud

Yes, finally, some decent weather to put a smile on my face despite the temperature. Ahhh, as I sit here at the kitchen desk looking out at our full bloomed crepe myrtles past our deck, I see medium size droplets of rain falling ever so lightly onto the now dark brown ipe. Makes me happy... calms me... and with yes93.3 playing soothing sappy not-so-familiar Chinese songs, I'm happy. Bruce is at his desk upstairs doing some math problem that Sam called to tweak his brains with; all is well at the Ryan household. No need for anything, on problems, no stress, no anything except rain, clouds and serenity.

Life is good.

My New Malaysian Friends

We just got back from having a sumptuous meal at Celine's. We were invited over for some nasi lemak. Directly translated meaning coconut rice. But it comes with an array of sides. Tonight, Celine spoilt us with some deep fried anchovies, plain omelette, squid sambal, prawn sambal and big side bowl of chicken curry. My my my... Bruce impressed me and ate everything on his plate. He even ate the cucumbers that he dislikes!! He's such a good guest, my baby. Makes me SO proud of my little Asian husband lol. I had more than enough of my share and more... it was so good! Moreso, Celine let us bring home chicken curry, home made prawn crackers and curry powder all the way from Malaysia that his uncle had brought her recently. Talk about southern hospitality, I think us Asians are FAR better then them lol.

Celine, Vincent (Celine's husband) and their housemate, Andrew, all work at the Collierville Red Sun Buffet. Bruce and I frequent it whenever we need a quick and fast hot meal or when I'm craving egg tarts lol. I must add that this buffet in particular has much better quality Chinese American food than the others we've been to. Even Bruce's colleague, Loyal and his wife, drive all the way from Bartlett to Collierville to come to this buffet. ...the added incentive for us is that we get to have special dishes that only the staff get to enjoy lol... which is always more authentic Chinese food. The other day, Celine made vegetable curry YUM!!! It's always nice to be treated special lol.

Gawd I'm so full I can't even think straight to type anything that makes sense. Time for some Z's lol.

Summer

As much as I dislike the hot and humid weather here, the nice thing about the summer holidays is having Bruce (all to myself) lol. Like I tell all my women friends who ask "doesn't he drive you insane being home all day?". More accurately, I drive him insane 'coz I'm so annoyingly 'sticky'. "Where are you going?" (when he leaves the room)... "what are you doing?" (when I don't hear a peek out of him for awhile). The poor guy... how does he enjoy his summer vacation with me harping on his back lol. I gather he enjoys me 75% of the time. The rest he just wishes I'd go get a pet or something lol.

Still, it's so nice to be able to laze in bed from 8pm till 3am watching tv, waking up relatively early then take afternoon naps almost everyday. ...and I'm not talking about 20 mins naps like I'm used to. I'm talking about hours and hours of deep interrupted sleep. What a life eh?!

So despite the horrible ugly weather, I get to hang out with Bruce whether it's here or being out of town. It's nice. Okay, so the house isn't spotless but I haven't been that good about cleaning anyway... I'm just not looking forward to school getting my husband back in a few weeks.

My Crazy Buddy, Mathi

I've known Mathiazagan Gurusamy since I was 17.... I recall this big tall Indian guy who'd always walk into Calculus class at least 10 mins late in his brown George Micheal leather jacket. And without fail, Mr Kittle would stop in the midst of his sentence until Mr Gurusamy got his seat at the back of the classrooom. Mr Cool, I think he thought he was. Okay, I guess he was pretty cool... and he's never lost it ever since.

We became really good friends when I eventually found my way to Indiana State University and somehow, we hit it off and became buddies forever! It's been like that ever since. We keep in contact... I email and he calls. Works for me.

Today, he called me from China - where he's working now. He was in Poland before that and Hungary before that where Bruce and I got the chance to visit him. He's having the time of his life, got a great job, found a very nice apt in Xiamen and to top it off, he's getting married next Spring (with Helena) and life is just soooo good. We reminized about our high school days, our college days, the countless stupid things we did while in school and back home partying with each other; me picking up men and him women while we sat next to each other at the bar... my goodness, how did we end up being where we are today just cruising past the last 20 years of our lives being not-so-smart?! I guess we got REAL lucky... I'm proud of who is he today and he's thankful I didn't marry a loser husband lol. What more can friends ask for!?

We're meeting up soon enough... before the wedding... probably in Bangkok, Japan... or when I get my butt up to China again - hopefully I can keep to my promise and not be there without the husband. I've talked about being Chinese and being mistreated by the mainlanders and not wanting to return without a Caucasian by my side. But I'd be with Helena (Mathi's fiance from Spain and she's white) and she'd be equipped with a car and a driver (Mathi promised over the phone today lol) and I'd be equipped with the language so that might work in favor for us...

Can't wait to be at the wedding!

Back From Montreal

Well, it's back to this extreme heat that I certainly do not enjoy. The 80-something hot weather in Montreal seems so mild compared to this disgusting humidity at home... thank goodness for air-conditioning .

Montreal was fun; as always, travelling with the husband is the bomb! He does all the research and I get to enjoy every bit of it. The food in Montreal wasn't anything to scream about. I mean, they have okay food but other than their smoked meat at Schwartz's (that the husband likes a lot more than I do - I'd settle for Memphis BBQ anyday!!) there really isn't much else to talk about. Like in Toronto, they have good Lebanese food so we got our fill of falaffels and Lebanese-made pizza. Unlike Toronto, Montreal is not known for her Chinese food. We had a good expensive seafood dinner at Maestro SVP but nothing you can't really get in other cities... the fun was mostly had at the annual Laugh-A-Lot festival and the three shows we went to see (which you can read about in the husband's blog).

I would certainly go back to Montreal again for the comedy festival but it's not one of those cities that makes me hungry and drool when I think about her. No wonder I can't remember if I'd ever been there during my high school days in Toronto lol.

Wedding Crashers

is FUNNY! Ridiculous, yes. Stupid, yes. But funny! :) Bruce and I enjoyed it. There were some chick flick moments but it wasn't too bad (not for me at least). I'm glad I didn't go watch it alone. Not the kind of movie a girl would go watch it on her own. A little vulgar and quite a few topless women scenes. But I liked it and it kept me awake throughout the entire movie! Best for perverted teenage boys... ok, ALL perverts LOL!

Do You Have A Stupid Friend Too?

This is the story of my girlfriend Liz (Part 1) Names are changed.

Yes, another bitching session... sit back and relax.

Okay, this is a pretty long story but I'd try to make it as simple as the girl (lol) I'm talking about.

Liz was married to, Al, a nice guy. An Arab; oh excuse me, Persian. From day one, she knew he was simple. Almost simple-minded at times. He'd been through hell and back from the day he left Iran by himself and trekked all over Europe for salvation. Eventually, he arrived in Quebec and then settled in Ottawa (that's when she met him online, met up and got married).

By year five of their marriage, she was itching to better her life ie materialistically, status wise... Liz, shall I say, is more of an extrovert (but hard to get along with almost at the same time) while Al is a pretty self-sufficient kind of guy like many men. She began cheating with Steve. Steve, a Canadian divorcee with a kid who was an unemployed brick-layer and a former neighbor to boot. I knew details of her shameless cheating from day one. After many months of her affair with Steve, Al found out about it. He hacked into her internet account and her emails and read all her emails sent to me and another girlfriend, telling us of all the sordid sexual details. Apparently, what started the 'suspicion' was when another fellow Arabic friend of his staying in their old apartment building saw Liz walking out of Steve's apartment at 10pm one evening. After Al had confirmed everything on his own (the emails and following the both of them one day) he confronted her. I'm surprise she's still alive for I was sure the quiet guy Al was had a raging temper that was about to explode. Nope, he kept it cool... but told all his friends and professors in school what a whore his wife was. She, not surprisingly, made it out to be his fault since he was going to school all day and worked third shift into the wee hours of the morning. She blamed him for not having anything in common with her, how he didn't spend time with her and how she needed attention. Never was he ever clued in of the situation as far as I'm concerned.

Anywayz, she moved to Toronto and went to grad school and they eventually got divorced about a year or so later. In the meantime, 33 year old Liz started dating. I encouraged her as much as I could to meet and date tons of different types of men. WRONG! She didn't understand that finding the right man took time and stamina. So not surprisingly at all, she leaps into a SERIOUS relationship with almost the first man that comes along. This time, it's with another Steve. Another unemployed Steve to be precise. It's been more than a year since they've been 'dating' and many months since she's moved into his apartment. He's still unemployed. Brace yourself, I haven't gotten to the STUPID part yet.

A couple of months ago, Liz graduated with her Master's in education to teach pre-school children. Why she needed a Master's in that field boggles my mind till today since she'd been doing that from the time she was 16, was promoted to be a supervisor of a child care in Singapore (in her mid 20s) and makes very good money as a part time nanny. For a good month or so, she found it hard to get a job. She decided to look outside Canada. First China. Which I personally thought was a good idea for her since she's fluent in Mandarin and she could kick Steve to the curb. WRONG again! She brought up the fact that she would ask Steve to move with her to China and she would support him financially. There is no depth to Liz's logic. Okay, logic and Liz don't seem to go together lately. To her, moving to another country is like me going to the mall. She doesn't see a problem in taking him with her nor does she foresee any complication. Hmmm... let's see... he doesn't speak Chinese, he won't be able to get a job (no Chinese working visa), nor are they married so what name on Earth is he accompanying her to China as... and this is the same man who apparenly (Liz told me herself) has stopped paying child support?! Yeah, he's gonna' be able to leave the country! I pointed all this out to her(not the child support bit) and she claimed that with his degree in Environmental Science, he could get a job in China. (yeah trashman hahaha!) I rest my case... after all that, and practically a screaming session between her and I, she didn't get the job in China. I heaved a BIG sigh of relieve.

Last week, Liz calls. "I got a job in Weimar, Germany!!". Where in the hell is Weimar, Germany, I asked. Outside Frankfurt... that's all I know. Three hours train ride outside Frankfurt, she comforted. Sadly, that might be all SHE knows. She took the job (pre-school teacher) without much research about where she's going, what kind of school she'd be teaching (she did say they only have 120 kids in the entire school that has pre-k right through high school LOL) and just general stuff people find out before one just picks up his/her life and move to a whole different continent. I know 'coz even as a naive kid at 16+, my dad made me do all that research on my own (which wasn't much). But I knew what I was getting into when I got to high school in Canada. I have made drastic moves like that quite a few times in my life and I know the older you get, the harder it is; and that's without a language difference, mind you. Maybe being uncalculating is the way she works, but it certainly seems risky (and stupid) to me AND another person next to you that you will be supporting financially, emotionally, sexually. I told her that if she wanted to support a bum, there were tons of unemployed hotties out in Germany with the unemployment rate that high hahaha!

Stay tuned. They leave Toronto on Aug 10th...

For another cheating 'post', see the one in June 2004

I'm Peeling

Yes, scaly, lizard-like and certainly unattractive, my entire back has finally stopped (well, almost stopped) itching and starting to peel. Soon, I'd have a patchy colored back and soon enough, I'd be back to normal. I know, you don't care and didn't need to know all that detail :)

But, soothing my warm-feeling, half itchy scaley back is awesome cool weather. Constant heavy drizzle, mild wind and absolutely no sunshine in sight. My kind of day! I went out to run some errands in the morning but I'm in for the day and it makes me just want to curl up in bed and watch my Chinese DVDs all day... which I will after I get this published.

It's days like that that make me appreciate our house SO much more :) It's good to be alive. Scaley back or not.

I'm Well

It's been awhile since all the banking crap happened to me... I won't say anything about that or I'd just swear too much. My husband's blog has said enough.

Summer started and we welcomed it with a nice trip to Tokyo. Had a ton of fun as usual but this time, for some reason, we couldn't get around to dealing with jetlag which we never had a problem with before. Karaoke at 8am, ramen at noon lol just seemed so wrong. We celebrated the husband's birthday on the evening of our arrival with Jun and Julie. Jun-san being our favourite sushi chef at Rainbow Roll (he's no more working there) and Julie being our favourite waitress in Seattle at Nishinos :D We went to this cool restaurant called Koma in Ginza. That is now my all time favourite restaurant in Tokyo :) Too bad Jun-san didn't get the job he'd hoped. Still, he just emailed and said he's working at a new restaurant with a very big selection of shochu YUM! Maybe we might get a chance to see him before school starts in August. It's up to the good people at American Airlines :D

Since Tokyo, we've also been to Boston and Maine. We stayed at the 'Nine Zero Hotel' in downtown boston which I liked a lot... I had a ball shopping for shoes and certainly overdose on lobsters and clams :) Double yum! I saw the house my husband grew up in (WOW!) and met up with my mother-in-law's best friends Mr and Mrs Roll. That was nice... we spent about 7 hours at their house (out of the heat) chatting about everything under the sun. It was also nice to be able to confirm (by Mrs Roll) the stories from the husband about his sister were all true. We went to Harvard; I saw the window where the husband's freshman room was and got a Harvard sweatshirt. Of course, we had ice cream... lots of ice cream. The best was the burnt sugar ice cream at Christina's in Cambridge! YUM!

Maine, on the other hand, was VERY different for me... VERY rural. Despite the beautiful lake where I spent more than half my days on the 'oasis island' laying like a walrus waiting for the next meal and/or drink, is not my favourite vacation spot (Bruce would say that is an understatement hahaha!). I came home with serious sun burn on my entire back. That'll teach me.

Next stop, Montreal for the Comedy Festival.

I'm SO Disgusted!!!

Since there are SO many believers out there who think justice was done yesterday (NOT!) on the Jackson case, I'd like to see everyone of them put their sons in bed with him for the next two years.

The next parent who puts her son in that bedroom with this freak DESERVES to be another victim. YUK(!) he is such a sick animal. You've got to give it to him though. He certainly knows how to pick his victims.

My Grandfather Died...

the day we arrived in Tokyo, my brother told me online while chatting that my grandfather had passed away the day before. I was surprised, I guess. Then again, he'd been sick for awhile. My mom had informed me that my faher had been going to the hospital almost on a daily basis to visit him. Just weeks ago, my brother and Geraldine had brought Emma to visit him. Though not his first great grandchild, certainly the only one he would recognize. The other one, a boy, was brought into this world just a month after the wedding which he was not informed.

I called my dad when Kevin said it was probably a good idea since he was upset. I didn't reazlize that he meant angry not sad... until I spoke to my mom. It's a long long story but the relationship between my paternal grandfather and ALL his kids from his legitimate wife, my grandmother, and his misstress, is a painful encounter. My grandfather was certainly not an ideal grandfather to us, much less a good father to his six sons and one daughter. At the end of the day, only my father (and his mistress) were there by his deathbed. ...so I called my dad and thought I might give him a little emotional support. Instead, he cut me short and told me to have a good time in Japan and that he would email. O-KAY. I called my mom and bitched about it. I called despite that fact that I have not been happy with my dad the last year or so since I last saw him in SFO. ...and that's another too-long story...

Turns out that dad's been bitter about his dad's bitter life. A smart man who's lead a long but loveless life. He was not a good father and a terrible husband to his first family (matchmade as kids that didn't work out DUH!) and did the same thing in his second relationship. I guess his mistress and him, both Satan's children, got along well... both beat the hell out of their sons and were terrible parents. So much so that the youngest of the three ran away from them to my grandmother and was raised by her from an early age of six, I believe.

So my grandfather's passed away... and I'm not there to pay my restpects. No loss. I didn't respect him when he was alive so why be hyprocritical when he's no longer with us. I'm not sad... I don't feel any loss. He's just another face that I'd never ever see again.