Yes, another bitching session... sit back and relax.
Okay, this is a pretty long story but I'd try to make it as simple as the girl (lol) I'm talking about.
Liz was married to, Al, a nice guy. An Arab; oh excuse me, Persian. From day one, she knew he was simple. Almost simple-minded at times. He'd been through hell and back from the day he left Iran by himself and trekked all over Europe for salvation. Eventually, he arrived in Quebec and then settled in Ottawa (that's when she met him online, met up and got married).
By year five of their marriage, she was itching to better her life ie materialistically, status wise... Liz, shall I say, is more of an extrovert (but hard to get along with almost at the same time) while Al is a pretty self-sufficient kind of guy like many men. She began cheating with Steve. Steve, a Canadian divorcee with a kid who was an unemployed brick-layer and a former neighbor to boot. I knew details of her shameless cheating from day one. After many months of her affair with Steve, Al found out about it. He hacked into her internet account and her emails and read all her emails sent to me and another girlfriend, telling us of all the sordid sexual details. Apparently, what started the 'suspicion' was when another fellow Arabic friend of his staying in their old apartment building saw Liz walking out of Steve's apartment at 10pm one evening. After Al had confirmed everything on his own (the emails and following the both of them one day) he confronted her. I'm surprise she's still alive for I was sure the quiet guy Al was had a raging temper that was about to explode. Nope, he kept it cool... but told all his friends and professors in school what a whore his wife was. She, not surprisingly, made it out to be his fault since he was going to school all day and worked third shift into the wee hours of the morning. She blamed him for not having anything in common with her, how he didn't spend time with her and how she needed attention. Never was he ever clued in of the situation as far as I'm concerned.
Anywayz, she moved to Toronto and went to grad school and they eventually got divorced about a year or so later. In the meantime, 33 year old Liz started dating. I encouraged her as much as I could to meet and date tons of different types of men. WRONG! She didn't understand that finding the right man took time and stamina. So not surprisingly at all, she leaps into a SERIOUS relationship with almost the first man that comes along. This time, it's with another Steve. Another unemployed Steve to be precise. It's been more than a year since they've been 'dating' and many months since she's moved into his apartment.
A couple of months ago, Liz graduated with her Master's in education to teach pre-school children. Why she needed a Master's in that field boggles my mind till today since she'd been doing that from the time she was 16, was promoted to be a supervisor of a child care in Singapore (in her mid 20s) and makes very good money as a part time nanny. For a good month or so, she found it hard to get a job. She decided to look outside Canada. First China. Which I personally thought was a good idea for her since she's fluent in Mandarin and she could kick Steve to the curb. WRONG again! She brought up the fact that she would ask Steve to move with her to China and she would support him financially. There is no depth to Liz's logic. Okay, logic and Liz don't seem to go together lately. To her, moving to another country is like me going to the mall. She doesn't see a problem in taking him with her nor does she foresee any complication. Hmmm... let's see... he doesn't speak Chinese, he won't be able to get a job (no Chinese working visa), nor are they married so what name on Earth is he accompanying her to China as... and this is the same man who apparenly (Liz told me herself) has stopped paying child support?! Yeah, he's gonna' be able to leave the country! I pointed all this out to her(not the child support bit) and she claimed that with his degree in Environmental Science, he could get a job in China. (yeah trashman hahaha!) I rest my case... after all that, and practically a screaming session between her and I, she didn't get the job in China. I heaved a BIG sigh of relieve.
Last week, Liz calls. "I got a job in Weimar, Germany!!". Where in the hell is Weimar, Germany, I asked. Outside Frankfurt... that's all I know. Three hours train ride outside Frankfurt, she comforted. Sadly, that might be all SHE knows. She took the job (pre-school teacher) without much research about where she's going, what kind of school she'd be teaching (she did say they only have 120 kids in the entire school that has pre-k right through high school LOL) and just general stuff people find out before one just picks up his/her life and move to a whole different continent. I know 'coz even as a naive kid at 16+, my dad made me do all that research on my own (which wasn't much). But I knew what I was getting into when I got to high school in Canada. I have made drastic moves like that quite a few times in my life and I know the older you get, the harder it is; and that's without a language difference, mind you. Maybe being uncalculating is the way she works, but it certainly seems risky (and stupid) to me AND another person next to you that you will be supporting financially, emotionally, sexually. I told her that if she wanted to support a bum, there were tons of unemployed hotties out in Germany with the unemployment rate that high hahaha!
Stay tuned. They leave Toronto on Aug 10th...
For another cheating 'post', see the one in June 2004
