Monday, August 28, 2006

Annoying S.O.Bs

Recently, I have heard from quite a few of my Singapore friends who now live in America, that mere acquaintances are calling, asking for favors to buy them stuff here to be sent back home. While I do this often for my family, mostly by choice, they are my family! They can ask anything of me. Even ridiculous favors :)

The last couple of days, this former classmate of mine from Singapore has been leaving messages for me on msn messaging like 'when you're online, let me know' or 'are you there? you must be very busy'. Since I am perpetually set to 'away' status namely trying to stay away from people I don't care about, I have been ignoring her.

Well, this morning, I woke up to another one of these messages, 'let me know when you come online'. I messaged her and said 'hi, I'm here'. Stupid me. She started with a 'wow you've been very busy!'. I managed a slow 'yeah'. She cut any other small talk and said 'hey, I need a favor'. Surprise surprise. She told me she needs to buy crap for her nail business and this store has stopped shipping internationally. That she needs to mail the stuff to my home address and then I can mail them via usps to her. I thought about it and instead of saying 'no', I asked her what she was getting. No answer. Instead, she asked me if I will be seeing my family again. Meaning... if I am, I can pass the stuff to my family and my family can be her delivery people. HELL NO!!! What is she like?! She also did not mention about how she'd pay me for doing her this favor or even for the postage. I told her to let me know BEFORE she orders anything and since she doesn't have my mailing address, I think I'm safe for a bit. There is no way I'm doing this craptactular favor for her. She's not even a friend for crying out loud! Some people sure know how to annoy the hell out of me! Of course, right after asking for the favor, she types a quick 'gotta' go! I need to take my son to classes'. It's freakin' 8pm there! Unless her son is in some beer chugging class, I can't imagine what a 5 yr old boy would be doing out at this hour.

Another 'friend' of mine who went to high school with me in Canada, also a Singaporean, got my email from gawd knows who and emailed me... realize this: we had not contacted each other since 1987! She wrote me an email last year right before the new year and asked me to purchase some music for her on itunes 'coz she can't seem to do so from work. She also explicitly told me to hurry as it was URGENT! I deleted that email immediately and put her on my 'who-list'. What is a who-list? Well, if I put my friend, say... Jane on my who list... if anyone ever brings up Jane's name again in front of me, that will go, "Jane WHO?!" :D

What are these people like!? Surely it is not a Singaporean trait? Granted we're a selfish group of people, always thinking solely of ourselves; so if we're nice to you... BE CAREFUL lol! But I'm sure with some kind of sensitivity chip built in all of us, we can't all be so idiotic?!

Well these two people mentioned can go kiss my big round behind 'coz I'm not playing personal shopper nor mailman to either. Irritating specimen!!!

Sunday, August 20, 2006

Bad Translation...

where else... The Flavor Of Love.

Pashintz aka Patience aka girl who is half-cast with black and Chinese blood was voted out on Flavor of Love today. Well, not really voted out but she's out.

People in the know and eager to watch new episodes of the show will be happy to hear that brand new episodes of the fake reality show is now shown much earlier then before. Last season, it was on tv every Sunday evening (and quite rightly so with those humongous boobies and asses hanging out everywhere). The last couple of weeks, you can watch fresh episodes at eleven in the morning on the 'lord's day' - hahahaha, ok you know I'm only joking here. Not about the time of the show... the 'lord' thingy.

Anywayz, back to the show. This Pashintz girl who claims China is 'home' speaks Mandarin. Yes she really does. But for someone who claims home is China, her mother tongue sucks lol! Worst than mine hahaha! Anywayz, after she walked out on the show - even tho' Flav was gonna' give her a clock signifying that he actually wanted her to stay - she commented on one of the girls she had a spat with earlier that day. She said in Mandarin that the girl was just too much to deal with and basically, she used the word 夸张 or 'kua zhang' on her meaning 'to exaggerate; to overstate'. The translation written on the screen for us read 'she's a dirty whore'. That would be 賤貨 'jian huo' lol!

Talk about a mistranslation!!! 笨蛋! Ben dan! 蠢瓜! Chun gua! HAHAHAHA! (sorry if your computer doesn't read Chinese characters)

Saturday, August 19, 2006

Another Tree Episode

This morning, KOMT suggested that he agreed with his mil, my mom, that I should just leave the sorry ass Ray Shepard aka Mike's Tree Services aka SG's Tree Service aka Steve Witucki episode behind and go on with life. They both told me it just isn't worth spending more time and effort dealing with these losers again. Besides, the husband didn't want his very portable solar lamps stolen nor did we want them to do a crappy job on purpose. Reluctantly, I agreed and didn't call RS again.

At about 4pm earlier, Mike from Mike's Tree Services called. Yes, unsolicited. I asked him who told him to call and he said sorry ass Ray. Well, he didn't say 'sorry ass' of course. He asked me if Ray had given me a quote. I laughed aloud. I asked if he did not know the saga of the situation which I think he did have an idea since I do recall speaking to him on day two of this whole saga. Anywayz, he told me he would have the crew over within the hour to finish up what they have to.

It is now 7:27pm. Three hours have gone by. This is a big joke now. Gawd forbid they come 'coz guess who's not answering the door. Oh believe me, I've done it to furniture delivery people who were an hour late before (another story for another day), so you know I can sit here and ignore doorbells all day if I wanted to, which I will.

Can you believe this bunch of liars!? No phonecall to apologize, no call to say they can't make it today and maybe come on Monday. I have mentally written off the money we spent - not that I have any other alternative. Naturally, I have written the losers off this earth. This bunch of shady non-tax-paying of trash should all go fight the war since they don't contribute any other way to their own country - why send the smart young ones over?!?

My Baby Brother's Baby Girl

My favorite (and only) brother has a seventeen month old baby girl. Emma is the family's pride and joy. The little girl whom I have been buying a ton of presents for in the last two years is the cutest little addition to the family. She brings a smile to the entire family and has made life so different since she was born. Even her favorite (and only) ang moh uncle's life has altered. He certainly has bigger shopping bills to foot and more baby stories to listen to on a daily basis. But he loves her; yes he does! Yup, I have been shopping for baby/toddler stuff so much people, ie strangers, have been sending me free milk formula, free diapers, coupons, you name it, just to go buy more baby crap lol.

Yesterday, little Emma went to 'trial school'. Since she is not quite 18 months yet, my sister-in-law thought it might be fun and a good idea to take her to Pat's Schoolhouse to see how her daughter might like school before she is officially enrolled. ...so Emma got to skip her first day of her second phase in swimming lessons to go to a real classroom. ball!

How did Emma fair? Well, from my sil's report this morning (I got up early to call them 'coz I was excited to hear about it all), little Emma had ball! She had a wonderful time dancing (apparently, the only one who got up and danced by herself and in front of the mirror too mind you lol), playing outdoors (please don't let your legs get caught between the handle bar and slide like your auntie did in kindergarten lol) and feeding herself sweet cereal that she doesn't get to have at home. Everything was great until... until... it was arts and craft time. Yes, little Emma seemed to be a good social butterfly until she was asked to dirty her little fingers hahaha! What?! Take cotton wool and dip it in glue?! Huh?! That's what scotchtape and staplers are for! The girl got upset when she got glue and cotton wool on her little hands hahahaha! I roared with laughter when I heard this. That is so... so... ME!!! OMG, for someone who doesn't spend a lot of time with me, little Emma sure has a gazillion of her auntie's personality and traits. She's quick tempered and bubbly, she loves to laugh LOUD, she's goofy, she greedy, she loves all food, she loves to dance (but I do not dance in front of the mirror thank you very much), watch tv, sleeps with her mouth open lol, have things her way and omg, she hates making a mess or touch gooey stuff. This is a mini-me in the making lol! This is probably my poor brother's biggest nightmare hahahaha!

Everyday, I call my mom and/or sil promptly to hear of Emma's day and her new pranks. Never mind what's going on with anyone else at home. The stories about Emma brightens my days and makes me laugh like a hyena. She's a hilarious little imp who has absolutely changed my parents' life. She is the only person who can manipulate my dad and get him to ignore even the stock market on an active trading day. She is the only person who can calm him down and make him laugh instantly when he's upset. Needless to say, my dad, Emma's yeye, is her partner-in-crime. She is not allowed sweet stuff that much. What does yeye do? He buys home muffins and chocolates for his little hungry grandbaby. It used to be Starbucks cakes for our little black pug, Lucky... and now Lucky, like me, my dad's ex-princess, are now both chopped-liver lol.

So my baby brother's baby girl is my favorite little baby - the husband is my favorite big baby :D When kid number two comes for my brother and sil, it'll be yet another kid for me to love and spoil. Can't wait! ...and... "No! I Still Don't Want A Kid!"

Friday, August 18, 2006

Ray Shepard - Eat Shit And Die!!!

You're dishonest, deceitful and never mind being professional!

Okay, as you can tell, I'm pissed off with this ass of an idiot. Yes, I'm also an idiot to have paid these people to trim my trees. All $850! But the fact that they claimed they were done at almost 9pm in the dark and asked for payment, was I to say 'no', right!? Not especially since they were recommended by the company who does your yard - Doug's Quality Lawn Care. I have emailed Doug and he claims they were probably recommended by his supervisor Hairley.

Anywayz, it all started on Monday afternoon in the midst of my afternoon nap. Ray Shepard called and offered his services ie, come over to give me a quotation. He came, we met and he told me the guys would be there that AFTERNOON to finish at least half the job and would come back the next morning. That evening, I got home past 7pm and saw a bunch of tatooed guys in my front yard, a kid and a woman in the pick-up truck parked in front of the house. It was like a white trash convention! I ignored them. An hour later, they rang the doorbell and asked for water... or soda. I usually don't care since it really is hot here, but we were having dinner and I was miffed that they were disturning us and the entire neighborhood. I told them to pack up since I didn't want to hear it from the neighbors (not that they have complained before but I would be annoyed if I came home from a long day's work to hear tree cutting people in my neighbor's yard way past normal yard-working-hours). They claimed they would be done in 15 mins and would need payment. I was surprised but didn't question them. I wrote out a Citibank check and paid them. They returned minutes later - yes interupting our dinner yet again and our watching 'Big Brother' telling us they didn't except out-of-state checks. I was like 'HUH?'. It was either local checks or cash. Yeah I have nine hundred bucks sitting at home to paying a bunch of tatoo loosers. Even if I did, I wouldn't have given it to them. No one told me of the payment policy. Certainly not sorry ass Ray Shepherd which by now, I had realized that he had obviously subcontracted this job out to another group of people. So when I told them we didn't have a local check (so I lied), they just stood there... they did not offer to come back the next morning. They just stood there and Bruce and I looked at each other wondering... WTF!?

I gave in and said I can give them my personal check which has no money in the account. Another lie. They took it and left. The next morning, I walked out onto our front yard and GASP(!), they had no completed their job!!! SHIT! I called Ray Shepard. He seemed apologetic and promised the guys would return to finish up the job. That was Tuesday morning. Tuesday afternoon, he called to say the guys were at another job and would come first thing Wednesday morning. I was out all day Wednesday and when I returned mid-afternoon, no tree people, no trimmed trees. I called RS. No reply. Called the tatooed idiots, they said they would call me back. Thursday, I called RS. Left a message. No reply.

It's Friday evening... nothing. I will continue calling this ass till he returns call or give me a sign that he's alive. I have a bunch of numbers... (901)503 1778 - he says this is his cell but it's actually his wife's - or so he claims. Then there is (901) 4815338 for Mike's Tree Services (the flyer which he first gave me) but Ray says not to call that number. I did anywayz and Mike seem to know exactly what job I was talking about... and Wes (one of the tatoo fools) of SG'S Tree Service (901) 237 7044. By the way, the check had to be written out not to Mike's Tree Services nor SG's Tree Service... it was written out to a Steve Witucki and was cashed at about 2pm on Tuesday afternoon. My own fault for not cancelling that check on Tuesday morning when I found out about the incomplete job. Arrgh!

If you're in Memphis and the surrounding areas and get a flyer from any of these people, DO NOT use them!!! I learn it the hard by giving them $850 for nothing.

Monday, August 14, 2006

Another Year, Another Lunch Bag

Today is the King's first day back at teaching again. Year Six! Impressive considering merely a little more then 6 years ago, he didn't know if he should marry me, what his career path was or where he was going to live for awhile. Today, he got dressed early; obviously excited and just all smiles and kisses before he walked out of the door with his lunch bag - melted jalapeno cheese with leftover flank steak he made over the weekend in onion pita bread pressed on a panini grill. Yes, it's as good as it sounds especially since he can heat it up on the microwave in the office / cafeteria.

So it's back to my regular schedule. After a summer of sleeping at ungodly hours, I'm going to have to get back to sleeping way before Leno or Letterman comes on and waking up way way before Good Morning America starts airing. I miss it... I can't wait for it to be dark when I wake up every morning and most of all, I cannot wait for the cold weather to get here!! Cold weather means good moods for me, means going out more and just doing more stuff for me instead of staying in my bedroom watching my Korean dramas or Cantonese dramas from Hong Kong. Yes, a little different from the average person here in the US who longs for the bloody hot ass summer and wearing as little as possible and being out in the scorching sun and disgusting humidity. No, this Singaporean here loves her cloudy and rainy days and if it was winter every day of the year, she couldn't be more thrilled.

Well, I suppose it's back to school schedule, back to doing wifey high school teacher things. Attending football, basketball... sometimes even baseball games tho' the husband is pretty good about not making me go to every game; especially when he's not sure if we're gonna' win lol. No lacrosse, soccer or anything too bad yet tho'. We did go cheer for the track team once but that was fun 'coz it was out at Shelby Farms and I knew some of the parents who were fun parents with a good sense of humor ie, no Asian ones lol!

Saturday, August 12, 2006

My Mil Makes Me Laugh

My mother-in-law (mil) who is 73 still works full time. She's a hard worker I believe and she knows how to do her job well. But not too long ago, after her hip surgery, she was complaining about her new boss. How she can't believe this person wants everyone at the office at work everyday and clock-in their full eight hours. She told this to her son and he, of course, being a reasonable person told his mother 'well that's what they're paying you to do right? Work full-time?'. His mother answered in a huff and couldn't understand why her son could not for once see things in her point of view.

Today was a lovely day! After three weeks of drought here, we finally got some much anticipated rain. Not thunderstorm. Just rain. Lovely summery morning rain. Guess what!? My mil didn't go to work. Why? Her simple honest reason: 'coz it was raining. Yes, I'm totally serious. She had a doctor's appointment this past Tuesday so she didn't go in either. Now how would this deter the productivity in the medical centre she's working at? No wonder they are YEARS behind in transcripting their records hahahaha!

Friday, August 11, 2006

When There Is No Lock...



He builds a fortress.

This is what a 16 year old boy has to turn to in order to protect some of his privacy. He claims it's a fortress... like he's playing war... but we ALL know what kind of a war he's playing by himself LOL!

Thursday, August 10, 2006

Stupid People - Who Are NOT My Friends

No, I'm not gonna' blog about the only piece of news today all over the world that has to do with the other group of stupid people; damn terrorist! ...and I usually blog about the people I know. Especially the stupid ones. But I just read this piece on Reuters about a group of stupid criminals and I can't help but share it with all of you for a good laugh. Where else better to find 'people like that' but in Singapore's neighboring country lol.

KUALA LUMPUR (Reuters) - Malaysian thieves used a net and rope to haul an ATM cash dispenser through a glass wall and down a flight of stairs, only to discover they had grabbed a check deposit machine by mistake.

The three robbers fled after realizing the failure of their plan, in which they used a pick-up truck and a lorry to yank the machine from its moorings, the Star newspaper said on Thursday.

Automated teller machines (ATMs) have recently been the focus of a spate of robberies or robbery attempts in Malaysia.

In one case, thieves loaded an ATM onto a truck but abandoned it about 5 km (3 miles) away when they discovered it had no cash.

Monday, August 07, 2006

Oh Shit!

If you had watched the first episode of Flavor of Love 2 last night, you'd understand the heading lol; but more on that later.

Yes, Flavor Flav is back on tv. After a season of going through the last 20 women down to the final two, psycho 'New York' and little hoodlum 'Hoops', Flav picked the latter but ended up not finding his soul mate in her after all... DUH?! So the little black man with eeiky gold teeth, eeiky hair, ok... the eeeiky black man (how's that lol) is back with twenty more hoochies to pick amongst them, a possible female kind whom he can spend the rest of his life with - maybe. None of them are girls, ladies (certainly not) nor would you consider them women. They are of an entirely different breed of... people, if you may. You'd understand what I'm saying if you just go watch one episode lol. It's a big joke for the rest of us watching it and yes, it truly is enjoyable lol. Ask the husband!

It was pretty funny when it started very quickly with a serious catfight and I commented that the girls this season look even trashier then the last. Hard to imagine that it's possible but really and truly, they are. Not a minute later, Flav is on air relating how in this season, he's not letting the producers pick his top 20 hoochie mamas but he's made it his own job to do so hahaha. That obviously confirmed my statement :D

Yes, again, the women went through the formality of being named by Flav. This time the names given were stupider and spelt even more incorrectly. But sort of white people spelling the way they think rappers and idiots would spell by adding a 'z' after everything... only not exactly appropriate. So thanx producers! It would have been more entertaining to just let Flav spell everything wrongly on his own which I'm sure he's quite capable of doing. ...this season, the names include Somethin' - yes, that's her given name (maybe 'coz she can't really be 'someone' or 'somebody'). A girl who speaks with a serious lisp (and can't stop talking) who's been named Nibblez but everyone keeps calling her Nipples... there is Buckwild, Buckee (if I remember correctly - I know there were two Buck-somethings), Beautuful, Patienz... and there are like five girls with gaps in their teeth but I can't remember their names only what the husband kept repeating during the naming session, "call her Whistle!" hahahaha! I can't remember any more of those crazy names. I just know there is a big momma in the house this time and she scares even ME with her HUUUUGGGEEEEEEEE breastuses. I swear, they were EVERYWHERE in last night's show and they will be everywhere till she's eliminated lol.

So the usual fights and screaming sessions went on and much to our amusement, it was fun and hilarious. But someone topped tv history last night and it was far better then last season when insane New York spitted at that slut of a white trash Pumkin whom by the way, has been on forty three other reality shows kissing men and showing the world just how easy it is for a man to remove her knickers. Last night, Somethin' ps'd on national TV. When I say 'ps', I mean it by the very hokkien (Chinese dialect) term of PANG SAI aka pooped, aka shit. Yes, I'm totally serious! The girl shit'd in the living room and on the stairs in Flav's crib! HAHAHHAHAHAHA! I'm sorry, it's just hilarious and I do feel sorry for the girl. But you have to admit, it's never been done before(!); or never been aired. I mean, in the midst of celebrating the ousting of the first five girls, poor Somethin' had to slip away to the bathroom upstairs rather quickly, only for everyone to be horrified by the smell and then, sight of it on the stairway lol. OMG I nearly pee'd my pants laughing. It was just too much!! Poor girl will never ever live that down for as long as she lives. I have one question however... where were her bloody bloomers? How did that crap (no pun intended) escape her knickers?!?!

So... if you missed it episode one, I'm sure VH1 will replay it another forty two times before the second episode airs this Sunday.