I Have Disgraced My Own People

Last night, the close to the year of the rooster, we ended up at sorry ass PF Chang's. Yes, we knew no smart Chinese would spend the last day of the year there (thus the heading of this piece)... but since it was the mil's birthday, and it is her favourite restaurant, the sil picked the restaurant. Before I go on, I have a bone to pick. I'd like to add that no matter which restaurant we end up picking... no matter if it's 30 mins drive away from my mil's home or like last night, less then 5, she is always late. Not by just 5 or 10 mins I might add. No, age cannot be an excuse. Neither can a new hip, bad knees or insanity. It's beginning to become a rather rude tradition in my eye and I honestly think she's playing it in her favor! No one would ever say anything to her of course. Why?! 'Coz she'd get defensive... then break down and cry. It's a routine now. What an irritating thing to do on purpose! No, her time is certainly not more important that mine and vice versa. So why should I be sitting there waiting on her and her new hip to arrive!? Arrgh!

Back to my most hated restaurant in the world (standing right next to the my most hated cheap shopping place in the world, Walmart), it would be the last time ever in the next three lifetimes of mine would I ever step into that wanna-be- restaurant that cooks wanna-be-so-called-food again. What a bad close to a good year!

It was pouring outside - my ideal weather. Unfortunately, nothing else was quite ideal. The food sucked! OMG, I used to enjoy a meal even at PF Chang's. The sweet and sour pork was good - in Tempe, AZ - and that's about it. But last night, I ordered the beef chow fun, the husband ordered the steamed salmon (so did the sil) and the bil ordered the Singapore fried noodles. Nothing, and I mean nothing, tasted even close to edible. The chow fun (which is supposed to be wider rice noodles not the narrow ones that is used for soup based dishes) was cooked with cheap diluted and too-salty dark soy sauce (which dark soy sauce is usually not), bad grade of beef that was cut thick and chewy. The salmon was overcooked and absolutely tasteless... the Singapore noodle which even I have come to appreciate in this country, had practically no ingrediants in it other than vermicelli and curry powder. WTF?!?! This is at a restaurant that was packed with people still waiting to be seated when we were leaving at 8:30pm in the midst of a heavy rainstorm!! Granted, it's a westernized Chinese restaurant with much nicer ambiance then many restaurants in Memphis. But my goodness, the food tasted like it was cooked by someone trying to cook (Chinese food) for the first time and failing really really badly. It was awful! It tasted bad bad BAD! Yes, I admit, I do have high standards when it comes to Chinese food; but I have also had good American Chinese food. Last night's food was beyond bad. It was simply BAD FOOD! Obviously, people who LOVE PF Chang's know nothing about good tasting food, never mind Chinese food or not.

To top it off, I had cranky 3 year old birthday girl Mackenzie pee on my nice Eileen Fisher pants. She is THREE!!! WTF?! If she's not toilet-trained then for crying out loud, wear phucking diapers!! No apologies from her mother. Why am I not surprised. She is the mother of the two kids who don't know how to say 'thank you', don't know how to say 'please', don't know how to say much I suppose. However, they sure know how to say 'I WANT, I WANT, I WANT!' very well!

I left dinner rather bitter and certainly still hungry. No sympathy from the husband who upon returning home, went straight back upstairs to his computer - as usual. I guess I never explained to him just how important last night was supposed to be. Well, I never had to. Things just went the way I made them... until last night since it coincided with the two birthdays. It's vital, what the Chinese call the eve of the Chinese New Year, 'the reunion dinner' to be filled with happy conversations at the table. No, not conversation like my sil had with the waitress (and me) about weight-watchers and about how much weight she's lost or how many points each dish has (and how much she can afford to eat) and how much weight each of her friends has lost. I don't phucking care!! I think it's rather insensitive! ...telling this to a fat girl. Sheesh... these skinny white bitches just can't even retain a brain in them to understand what sensitivity is, can they!? Never mind weight watchers. Try some brain teasers!! ...yes, the 'reunion dinner' should not only go out with a bang; everyone should be happy and there should always be plenty of each person's favourite food on the table... with leftovers for tomorrow, ie the next year. ...and in my family (and a lot others), that's when the head of the family gives out red packets to everyone, right down to the maids. But... what did I expect. It certainly isn't the husband's fault he doesn't understand the importance of the reunion dinner and how it should be. My own father doesn't even know everything and he's freakin' Chinese!! But I blame me and my own big mouth. We were supposed to go to Asian Palace last night. But I'd brought up the fact that Asian Palace would be packed - since anyone with a brain who wants Chinese food in the Memphis area would/should be there. Certainly everyone celebration the reunion dinner and wasn't cooking a feast at home would be there. I just couldn't picture us sitting there with prolong silence and annoyance waiting on food. So... not only did I get to close my year with bad food, be embarassed to be seen at that restaurant with not that great blah- company... I came home hungry, played SIMS on my Nintendo DS then went to sleep. Happy New Year to me.

Back to the sorry ass restaurant... anyone I know reading this, if you ever want Americanized Chinese food again, go anywhere; anywhere except PF Chang's. You want a nice atmosphere with your Chinese food, take-out some from a good restaurant and eat at home. If not, don't do Chinese. PF Chang's is just a place that people who don't know food and don't care what food tastes like go.